The Flabby Arm of the Law

Today, on my journey to the bus stop though Birmingham city centre I noticed an unusually large police presence.  To the best of my knowledge there were no crimes being committed, no protests or bomb threats, in fact at first I couldn't spot any real reason for their presence at all.  Most of them were simply milling around huddled together in small groups chatting to one another. 

Usually I expect to see one or two officers casually wandering around keeping an eye on that most prime of suspects, the public, but on my short walk, and I mean very short check out this map, I was passed by two police cars, three community support officers on bicycles and counted up to twelve other police officers dotted around the grounds of the Cathedral in pairs or small groups.

Eventually it dawned on me; the usual gathering of cosmetically challenged teenagers, which has been taking place as long as I can remember, must have caught the attention of the old bill.  Considering half-term started this week it all makes perfect sense, apart from the large number of officers required to keep a group of thirteen year olds in line.  You see these are most certainly not the knife wielding, brick throwing, cider swilling louts the Daily Mail would have us believe all teenagers are nowadays.  Even a casual glance reveals that these are pretty docile middle class kids, sporting the usual assortment of pricey designer clothes and excessive hair spray, flashing enough iPods around to buy Steve Jobs a small island.

Even if this did look like a troublesome group, a single officer observing from a far would be sufficient to call in the backup if required and appear far less oppressive to the eye.  I fail to understand why it took a stations worth of officers to "protect" this 200sq meter area from a bunch of harmless teenagers, is there honestly nothing better they could be doing?

Even more amusingly I received a letter only a couple of days ago from my Labour MP asking for my support in protecting police numbers from the "terrible Tory cuts", not fucking likely after this display of force.  If the recent gorging of the state has left us with 15 troopers spare to guard us all from a bunch of pre-pubescent bed wetters then I hardly think a little budget trimming will turn the streets over to violent mob rule.